it’s unix, not eunuchs

I’m a big advocate of maintaining impartial brain patterns by ignoring all tacit attempts to alter my behaviour. Pretty much I don’t believe anything that anyone tells me unless they have built some trust with me. By definition, a television ad does not have any credibility and therefore I’ve loved fast-forwarding through those ads. Tivo’s have helped implement that.

The next escalation in the war of free thought was inevitable. If consumers fast forward through the stupid ads then we’ll migrate the stupid ads to the show. In fact this is a return to the way that old television shows used to advertise. Think back to the days of dancing packs of cigarettes. So the networks are experimenting this month with this idea. Oreo bought a huge sponsorship with 7th Heaven to get some air time in the middle of the show and therefore couldn’t be tuned out.

Despite being a huge 7th heaven fan I’m here to tell you that if the show wasn’t going off the air in the next two weeks I wouldn’t put up with this nonsense. Their stupid ideas ruined about 30% of the show and didn’t make me want to buy an oreo to save my life. And in fact the result was directly opposite. Despite the fact that oreos are one of the few sweet treats that I enjoy…this sort of advertising is just repulsive on many levels. Their little jingle O-R-E-O worked on me much better than this silliness.

Finally, this change in advertising technique is basically a denial of new market realities. Computers have advanced to the point that customers can pay a decent fee in order to not be annoyed by companies. I realize that is anti-advertising but that is also what America is emanating. Customers have never wanted to be submitted to the awful theatrics of advertisers but they put up with it because it was impossible to avoid. Daily it is becoming easier and cheaper to simply just record the show and watch it at a later time and fast forward through the advertising. Shows that attempt to incorporate advertisers into their plot will quickly find themselves unpaid while unknown reality TV or indie film directors will fill their roles.

We’ve been held at ransom for decades by advertisers. That age is at an end. Consumer Reports kicks ass. Indie films kick ass. Public rating systems kick ass. Network shows where you can say fuck kick ass. Bored public broadcast shows that allow their plot to be polluted by advertisers are old school and are destined to die.

Now, please click on all the ads I have splattered across the website.  I know it’s hypocritical.  I’ve tried to keep it tasteful.  Please let me know if there’s too much advertisement or if a particular advertiser is offending you in some way.

My new DVR from Time Warner has an SATA expansion slot. So last night I ordered a 250gb drive and external enclosure for $150 shipped from newegg.com. It’s one of my rewards for dropping weight, so I’m glad to be able to order this and glad of the functionality it’s going to give me.

This is just a note for myself. Read if you like

On hold for 8 minutes. Stacy answers the phone. Asked for a manager as I have a problem that has been ongoing for months. Her manager is not there. Can I leave a number and my name and have the manager call me back? No, she can not promise me that he will call me back. I explained that I called on March 22nd and was promised a call back by March 29th. Call back did not occur. Stacy put me on hold.

13 minutes into the call.

PBX is still messed up. Hold music cuts out all the time.

17 minutes into the call. She is still waiting to see if she can get me a supervisor. Placed back on hold.

23 minutes into the call.

Stacy comes back on and tries to convince me that she can fix my problem. I explain the problem. She had no ideas and places me back on hold. 27 minutes into the call.

35 minutes into the call. Stacy tells me a manager/supervisor is available. I’m put back on hold.

39 minutes into the call Paula joins the call.

In an attempt to keep the conversation short I told Paula that I am a cheapskate and the house is cold. Yet the system keeps rebooting. Paula harangued me about the overheating issue. I had to assure her repeatedly that no the device was not in an enclosed space(like an entertainment center) and did not have anything(even a “piece of paper”) placed on top of it. Because manufacturing and installing a device in peoples homes that could malfunction if you put a piece of paper on it is such a great fucking idea. Anyhow I also mentioned to her that since they’ve already sent two people onsite to investigate that they would have found an issue with the install if there was a problem.

42 minutes into the call and I’m back on hold.

45 minutes into the call and Paula comes back on. Security device is installed on the box. If it doesn’t respond in a timely manner they will reboot the box. That has been disabled. Low signal issue. I explained that the other two techs haven’t seen this low signal problem. Turns out that there is an issue in the area that may be causing the low signal issue.

Credit offered on the account for the on-demand and dvr service. She will check my signals tomorrow and call me back.

Pointed out that I’ve been on the phone for 50 minutes. At a dime a minute that equals the $5 she wants to credit me. Additionally why didn’t I get called from the last on-site visit? For the money it costs to send a person on-site it certainly deserves a call-back. Credit given is 18.86.

Call finished 56 minutes in.

Another 56 minutes of my life lost to poor customer service. Maybe I should just start reading more.

It’s an interesting question that many Americans are bypassing.  You pretty much have to be a geek to know what’s up.

At first your computers would update themselves.  But they politely asked if it would be alright.  And if you were the 1% that had a hardware firewall you might get emailed advisories to update your firmware.  Now you can set up your computer to update it’s OS on a proactive and non-interactive basis.  Just whammo the system tells you it needs to reload and boom it’s done.  You AV software does the same thing.

But now you have more intelligent devices in your homes.  You have fridges with TV’s and internet connections.  Your HVAC cools and heats depending upon when people will actually inhabit you dwelling.  Your security system monitors the temperature in your rooms and the physical security of your home.  You may even have outdoor security cameras.

I don’t have much of this recent cool geekness but I do have a Time Warner Pioneer PVR in my home.  And it allows you to fast-forward through commercials.  I used to have a Dish Network PVR and it was much better.  Every time you hit fast-forward it went 30 seconds.  6 hits usually got me through a commercial break.  Time-Warner’s really wasn’t near as good.  You had to pay attention and sto the fast-forward when the show started back up.  But now now.  Sometime in the last week they upgraded my software.  The fast-forward functionality works much better…but it’s a less robust setup.  I have to reboot the device every once in a while.

And this gets to the point of my post.  It’s fine that providers want to upgrade their devices, I mean I do lease it from them, but shouldn’t they inform me of their intent to upgrade without notice?  Shouldn’t they give me an option to opt out?  Proactive upgrades without user acceptance are a Microsoft-type solution.  It’s semi-harmless now(what if a tornado warning was around and my damn TV wouldn’t work.)  But what happens when someone writes a virus that causes your internet-capable oven to overheat and catch on fire?  Shouldn’t you be able to tell the device to not automatically upgrade until it’s been released for a few weeks?  I don’t even know if the upgrade to my PVR was checksumed or if it just accepted it’s upgrade protocol(geek speek for I don’t know if it works right.)

Anyhow…while many of my friends in the tech field are busy writing RFCs for very specific things they are not busy writing documents that explain what customers deserve.  I know of no documentation that explains how software should be designed in order to embrace life and minimize it’s chance of harming anyone.  These are the building blocks of the Artificial Intelligence that is being defined daily and yet no one has stepped up to the plate and stated:  This is what is right for the world, this is what intelligence is, computers should be allowed to do this, computer vendors should be allowed to do that, government agencies should be allowed to monitor that.  It’s completely irresponsible and I suppose I should be busy writing the RFC that I’m so upset that it doesn’t exist…but at the moment I’m just angry and on vacation.

Let me note one small thing in passing.  The upgrade to my Time Warner PVR?  It’s an improvement.  But it doesn’t mean that I approve of the way that it occurred.  If you wear glasses today and the government fixed your eyes overnight(with a risk of making you blind) would you feel better in the morning?  Or would you feel violated that someone has changed your world or body without your acknowledgment?

called up…tried to get service…got lip instead…disconnected the service…they’re mailing me boxes and I’ll send the receiver back to them.

Called up Time Warner and they have someone scheduled to be here Saturday morning. Their DVRs are smaller, but if they work, I don’t care. And, did I mention that they were polite? Who would guess it, customer service wins out again.